The Sh*t your friends don't tell you about birth…But I'm keepin' it real!

Hope you all enjoyed reading Croix's birth story …but it's not all Glitz and Glamour! 

Well. Let me first start off by saying that giving birth was nothing that I was expecting. NOTHING. No one prepared me enough for what I went through..during or after. I love my son with every single ounce of me and would do it all over again in a heartbeat for him. ...But, here's the truth.

The top _5_ TRUTHFUL things you need to about giving birth:

1. Epidural. First and foremost: The Epidural DOES NOT hurt. I repeat DOES NOT. I am a pansy when it comes to needles. I am 28 years old and I still cry when I get poked with a needle. The Epidural was a cinch. All you feel is a little bit of pressure…not the sting from a normal shot. You have nothing to fear with the Epidural. Trust me. (Oh and please don't be 'THAT GIRL' that tries to go "all natural" but then ends up getting the Edpidural. If you are not a Saint or a freak of nature…get the damn thing. Don't kid yourself. Why go through all of that pain if it's not necessary?

2. Contractions. Contractions are a DOOZY. They are not "period like cramps" like all my friends told me. Honestly, I can't even compare this feeling to anything else on earth because it is so unreal…so unbearable. God bless you if you are the woman who gave birth without any pain medication. I'd love to hug you and then high five you or possible take you out to dinner to celebrate. When you start to feel your first contraction (and trust me---you'll feel it!!!)  call your Doctor, lie to them, and tell them that they are coming 1 minute apart so that you can get your butt to the hospital for the pain meds!! WARNING- having contractions was the most excruciating pain I have EVER went through.

3. Stitches. Bless your heart if you have to get any stitches. I had to. The healing period is ridiculous, uncomfortable, and almost unbearable at times. Stitches are never fun and DEFINITELY not fun when they are down below (just imagine that, would ya?) What an awful place to have stitches. For almost two weeks you repeat this process in the bathroom: Pee, squirt yourself with a water bottle, go through half a roll of TP to wipe away junk that is flowing out, change pad, spray vagina with numbing/itching spray, fill pad with witch hazel (ice pack), and then repeat about 12 times a day (no lie---just keepin' it real for you). The little "squirt bottle" is heaven sent. It will become your best friend. You will know what I'm talking about when the time comes.

4. The week after birth: I can't even explain this on a level that you will understand. If you have to get stitches- Lord help you during the first week. You know the people who walk out of the hospital just like they did when they walked in?…. yep, that doesn't happen. They are faking it. You are sore and by sore, I mean in SERIOUS pain. The ride home in the car….yeah, not a pleasant one.  Pray you don't have to go over any speed bumps. You get to walk around like an old lady with your back hunched over because that seems to relive the pain just a bit. You have to have your husband help you off the couch, get out of the car, and get into and out of bed... especially if you have the baby in your hands. As the days go on the pain get less and less. Your stomach is mushy. You look in the mirror every second you possibly can to check to see if it's going down (and it does- slowly). Make sure you buy 85 boxes of pads, if you don't…you'll be sorry. Your stretch marks are FULL BLOWN VISIBLE. No more belly blocking the view of those bad boys. However, when you hold that tiny little human being in your arms all of this the pain goes away because you are reminded of why you feel this way. It's whole heartedly worth every ounce of pain that you are feeling.  …but you are DEFINITELY feeling it!!!!

5. It's extremely hard to hold your bladder when you laugh & sneeze. Please don't tell anyone but I have peed puddles on the floor 3 times since I've had the baby. Once when we were in the hospital. John was changing Croix and he peed all OVER John.  I laughed so hard and could not stop the flow. It was embarrassing explaining that to the nurse.  Once when we put Croix in his Halloween outfit. John and I laughed so hard. Croix was so confused and his face was priceless. And Once when my Mom and I were trying to put a beanie on Croix's head. When you do anything out of the ordinary to this little guy he makes the funniest faces!!! So funny, that you pee yourself. Oh and the sneezing thing- I googled that and it's completely normal to have a little bit of pee come out in your panties. HAHA.


And here is something for your viewing pleasure:

Aimee Junnila Photography.

You just died at that cuteness, didn't you??

Thank you all for staying up with my blog. I'm not doing it as much as I would like. It's hard to break away from my precious baby boy! Look at that face!! I love spending every waking second with him. Up next, a WHOLE LOTTA photos of baby Croix. Including his cute Halloween outfit and Newborn Photos. God, I love him so much. How did I live without him?

Love,
Cas

Croix's birth story.

{This is extremely long. I did it that way so that I can look back on it one day and relive every detail}.

It was Thursday September 26, 2013...Croix's due date. I woke up at 4:30 AM because I was so anxious to get my day started. My Dad and Lois were in town and John and I were off from work. We met them for lunch at Chimentos then Lois and I went to get manicures. The day seemed to be dragging on forever. We were all anxiously waiting for 8:00 PM. When 6:00 PM hit, John and I really started to get nervous. Things were getting real. I had to call the hospital at 6:30 PM to make sure they were going to have room for me to come in that night. I called at 6:30 PM and got a "eat something light and head on in" from the nurse that answered the phone. I hung up and screamed- literally. My Dad and Lois were here with us at the house and they helped us to pack up the car. We had one suitcase, a toiletry bag, and a Boppy. John and I rode together to the hospital while my Dad and Lois followed behind. We barley spoke in the car. I mean, the nerves and butterflies were going a mile a minute. When we did speak it went a little something like this "OMG can you believe we are headed to go have our BABY?!?!?" We stopped at Panera for my "light dinner". We then arrived at the hospital around 7:50 PM. We went to the 4th floor and picked up the phone to have them buzz us in.

(About to check in for our induction at Celebration Hospital)

The charge nurse came out and told us that while we were on our way in they received a lot of patients that went into labor. She apologized and said "I should send you home but since you live 45 minutes away and if you don't mind waiting a bit then you can stay". Of course we agreed to stay- we were determined to have this baby. After filling out LOTS of paperwork they finally took us back about 9:45 PM. And then the fun started.

I was checked into the Labor and Delivery room. We had a sweet young nurse by the name of Doreen. Doctor Edwards was on call (the Doc that I really don't care for...but knew he was going to be on call for the night and that I had no chance of having the baby that night so it didn't matter). Immediately after getting my gown on he came in to do the dreaded "check". I was exactly the same: not dilating but 50% effaced. Wonderful.

Doreen asked me if I had a birth plan and my exact response was "Yes. Epidural at the first feeling of pain". She laughed....I was dead serious.

At 11:08 PM they decided to start the induction. Doctor Edwards ordered a pill called "Miso". This is a pill that gets placed underneath the cervix. It's primary job is to soften the cervix. The goal is to be 100% effaced (or softened). I was at 50% so the doctor told me that it would probably take 3 rounds of this pill to get to the 100% and that each pill could only be given every 4 hours. So basically, the nurses told us that this was going to be a long night and that we shouldn't expect to have this baby until later in the afternoon on Friday 9/27/13. I told my Dad and Lois to go ahead and head home to get some sleep since the nurses said nothing exiting was going to happen that night and they were going to arrive super early the following morning. Doreen told me that this pill would cause "period like cramps". I'm not sure what type of period cramps she gets, but I was in some serious pain with this pill. Although the nurses told me that I could have the epidural at any time, I wasn't dilating yet so I wanted to hold off.

3:00 AM rolls around and Doctor Edwards decides to give another "check" to see if the Miso is helping me progress any. Good news: I was dilated 1-2 CM's and my cervix had thinned out a little more. The Miso was working.

John and I tried to get some shut eye, which was extremely difficult to do in a hospital. John was sleeping on a very uncomfortable couch and I was falling in and out of sleep...which really means: waking up every 4 minutes to get through these "period like cramps". At 3:30 AM there was a light knock on the door. It's was my Mom. She tip toes in and says "I couldn't sleep so I just went ahead and left the house". It was really cute. I was so happy that she was there. Sometimes you just need your Mom.

At 4:00 AM my cramps were hitting an ALL TIME HIGH. WOW. I told Doreen that I was extremely uncomfortable and she suggested getting pain medication through my IV rather than the Epidural at that point in time. I agreed. Boy, did that medicine make me feel great! My eyes automatically felt heavy and I was feeling like I was floating on clouds. I loved it and can see how people get addicted to pain medication!! :) Honestly.

Around 5:20 AM Doreen actually "checked" me herself. She was shocked. I was 100% effaced and didn't need the 2 other Miso pills that they thought I would originally need. Then things got real, and got real fast....   At that point they gave me Pitocin...the medicine that causes you to dilate and brings on contractions.

Within minutes (but felt like seconds) I had full on contractions. When I say "FULL ON" I mean it. I don't want to ever feel contractions again. In fact, having contractions was worse than any part of giving birth that I went through. I would rather someone give me 25 Epidural shots in my back than to go through contractions again. I can't even explain them on a level that you would understand (if you have never felt one before). I don't know how women sit at home with contractions and wait to go into the hospital. I honestly felt like shooting myself in the leg would be less painful. The strangest part is that I could feel them coming on. My body would tense up and then BAM: an unbearable pain for about 10-20 seconds. An UNGODLY amount of time to endure that much pain. And they were coming about every 3-4 minutes. My poor Mom and husband were just sitting there staring at me as I was clinching onto the hospital bed rail with my death grip, moaning like a dying woman. I endured my horrific contractions until about 6:00 AM (40 minutes) before I BEGGED and I mean BEGGED Doreen to give me the Epidural.  I told her that "I feel like I am dying. I don't want to wait another second". She said she would notify the nurse and that she would be in "shortly". WELL, shortly turned into about another hour. Apparently there was an "emergency" that she had to tend to. HELLO- There's an emergency in my room- I'M DYING!!! Remember, I am in agony at this point.  (By the way, the pain medication that I had put in my IV was lonnnng gone at this point). In the mean time, my water breaks at 6:15 AM. I said to my Mom and John "Um, I either just peed myself or my water broke".  It was the strangest feeling. Gushing water coming from you and you can't control it. It was more than I imagined it would be. Gross.

Around 7:00 AM my angel came into the room. The lady with the good stuff: The Epidural. Doreen checked me right before I received the needle and I was 6 CM's. HOLY CRAP. Things were progressing and progressing at a rapid rate. John was nervous that everyone was going to miss the birth. People weren't expecting us to have the baby until later that day in the afternoon. He started texting people and told them that they better act fast and get themselves to the hospital ASAP.

Now, let's talk about the Epidrual. Remember that I am deathly afraid of needles. and I was deathly afraid of the Epidural. It. was. a. piece. of. cake.  I was in so much pain with the contractions that I didn't even know she was finished putting the needle in. When she was done she said "ok, you will start to feel this in about 10 minutes". I looked at her and said "what? you're done? That's it?". She laughed and it wasn't two minutes later that practically my entire body (from my boobs down to my toes) went completely numb. It was a crazy feeling….but a wonderful one. I felt like I was on top of the world. I didn't feel another contraction WHAT-SO-EVER. I told that nurse that I loved her and I laid my happy butt back down on the bed….feeling better than ever.

At this point things are a bit of a blur for me. This is where it got a little scary and crazy. The belt that they put around your belly to monitor the baby's heart rate wasn't picking up Croix's heart rate. At this point we had a shift change and get this…the new nurse's name was Moreen. Funny. Moreen was in my room every 5 minutes checking and adjusting my belt. It was causing an alarm to go off on her computer at her desk. Then, once we did get the belt in place Croix's heart rate was dropping with contractions. It was getting into the low 90's. Extremely scary. Anywhere from 120-160 is normal. She called the head nurse in and Dr. Marcantel. Dr. Marcentel was the on call doctor for Friday (which I knew going in). The Doc decided to put something called a "lead" on Croix's head. It reminded me of a headphone for an iPod. They put it inside of me and directly on his head. This gave them an accurate heart rate and it was much easier to monitor than the belt on my belly (it was still low at this point).

Like I said, things were a blur for me at this point. The next thing I knew our families were in my room.  It was probably around 9:00 AM at that point. Moreen checked me (while my family stepped outside the room) and I was at 9 CM's. I remember going into a little bit of panic mode because I knew we were almost ready to start pushing. She told my family to get out of the room because I needed to "take a nap". A nap? Who takes a nap at 9 CM's? Well, John and I listened to her instructions and took a 20 minute cat nap while our families waited in the waiting room.

Moreen came in about 20 minutes later and woke me up like a drill sergeant and told me that I needed to "practice pushing". I warned her that I didn't know how to push. She asked John to hold one of my legs while she held the other. I pushed a couple of times and she literally dropped my leg and said "ok, we will try later"...like she was pissed or something that I couldn't do it. I warned her, didn't I?

Between 9:20-9:40 AM Dr. Marcentel, Moreen, and the head nurse were in and out of my room. They were extremely concerned with Croix's heart rate. All I can remember is that they were talking amongst themselves and I was trying so hard to focus on their conversations. The Doc suited up and had me push with him. John was holding one leg while Moreen was holding the other. I pushed two times and nothing. I felt like they were annoyed with me. I remember feeling like I was disappointing them.  Moments later the doc said to John and I "Ok, his heart rate it too low. We have to get him out now. You have two options: 1) I can use forceps 2) You will need a c-section. And you need to decide now". HOLD UP!! My heart stopped for a moment. Clearly I didn't want a c-section. But I didn't want to use anything that was going to hurt my baby. I asked the Doc if the forceps were going to harm him in any way and his response was "Not at all. It will hurt you more than it will hurt him". I looked at John who was standing by my side and he looked at me with a scared look on his face. I could tell he was so nervous. I knew he knew more of what was going on than me. I told the Doc "Ok, let's try the forceps".

Moreen gets on her phone and I hear her say "we are going to deliver…" and then she speaks a little softer to the point where I cannot hear what she is saying on the phone. It wasn't seconds later that about 5 more people walk in the door. Most of them stayed behind the curtain and all I can see was their feet at the bottom. One lady stepped out and stood at the incubator. I have John at my shoulders, Moreen on my left leg, the head nurse on my right leg, and the doc down below. I can hear him messing with the forceps. I prayed at this point that John wouldn't pass out.

Around 9:55 AM I started to push. This was the most unreal part of it all. Everyone in the room was cheering me on. "You can do it! Great push! Do that again! Yes, that right there- again!" I was pushing with all of my might. I don't know how I did it but I knew the alternative was a c-section so that must have given me the strength. I only pushed 3 times before his sweet little head popped out. The doctor looked at me and said "Ok, one more push and you will be holding your baby boy!" I pushed as hard as I could and at 10:04 AM Croix William Moon was born.

Since his heart rate was so low they immediately gave him to the nurse next to the incubator. I remember feeling so relived. I was lying on the bed, exhausted, crying. I was crying tears of joy while listening to his cry. I was holding John's hand. John kissed my forehead and said "good job". I cried some more. About 2 minutes later they placed Croix on my chest. I can't even describe that feeling. It's something that you have to experience yourself. My heart was so full and I was instantly in love with him. He was so alert. Him and I starred at each other for a good 15 minutes.

 John was leaning over and kissing the both of us. Aimee came in and took some pictures for us. After 45 minutes of skin to skin time the nurse came back in to weigh him and take his stats. She cleaned him up and let John hold him. I cried even harder. My whole world was right in front of me. I never knew I could feel a love this strong. It was such an emotional time.

Shortly after spending quality time alone, our family came in. It was such a magical time. Everyone was crying tears of joy. They all instantly fell in love with him too. How could you not? He was perfect. All 7 lbs. 03 oz. and 19.5 inches of him.

We stayed in Labor and Delivery for about an hour and a half after giving birth to Croix. Before they moved us to our recovery room they noticed that I had an unusual amount of blood clots in my uterus. This was causing me to loose more blood than normal. The doctor's watched me closely over the next day. On Saturday morning (the day we thought we were going home) the doctor told us that we had to stay an extra day due to all of my blood loss. On Sunday morning at 7:20 AM the doctor came in and told me "You have lost about a quart of blood but we are going to go ahead and let you go home. Just take the medicine I prescribed you and call if you have any concerns". He left the room and John and I gave each other an air-five across the room. We were so excited to get out of there. It's difficult to get any sleep when nurses are coming in and out of your room every hour. Plus, we were ready to get our baby boy home!!

Around noon on Sunday we walked out of the hospital as a family of three. We were on cloud nine.

We strapped our little baby in the car seat and drove away and from that moment on our lives were changed forever.

We are completely obsessed with Croix. He is the perfect baby and the perfect addition to our family. We don't know how we lived before without him. We are extremely grateful to God that he has chosen us to be his parents. We truly are lucky.

Up next: "The Shit your friends don't tell you about birth" post ;)